...my family because the people in it are awesome, my God who gives me peace, my blog and you, my faithful readers who willingly read this stuff.
At this point in my career, I feel it is important that I reflect on the positive things in my life. The days when I would get up in anticipation of going to work are fading away. I do not know if the problems I am encountering are unique to this particular group of students or whether their behavior is a reflection of the values of today's society as a whole. Since when is it OK to show direct defiance, argue, laugh at, look through teacher's desk, challenge EVERYTHING the teacher asks to do, and curse at the teacher?
To be frank with myself, I have to admit that I've been given a challenge this year and I currently suck at it. I wake up each day with the hope that today will be better and most always leave work disappointed.
Oh my.....I took a break from writing this post and turned on the radio. This song was on.
God has clearly spoken to me just now. I think I got his message.... I am to stop this whining right now and DO IT ANYWAY.
I had a class that made me have serious whim whams every time they
ReplyDeletecame through the door.
The strong sentiment of loathing everything about me was palpable in
my room with the dynamic of those kids. What happened in that year
with those kids is a bad memory in my teaching career, and gave me the
very same feeling you are having now. One boy drew gross pictures on
the white boards sexually harrassing a girl in the class, another girl
wrote "B****H" on the whiteboard and showed the class. They were
very, very young. I couldn't do anything right where they were
concerned. And the same year I had a class that was a veritable "love
fest" of kids for whom I could do no wrong, who just thought I was the
coolest teacher ever. A class where everything just worked, and they
loved it all. Utterly confusing, disheartening, but mostly confusing.
Even now, I wonder if teaching in a Christian school might not be a
more appropriate choice, even though those kids are long gone. Maybe
some day we can swap stories. I am sorry you are going through this.
Remember, you will never get what you cannot handle.
Zhenya,
ReplyDeleteDo you think it's because you started in the middle of the school year and they think they can re-route you back home? Heather is right by saying: "you will never get what you cannot handle". You'll be fine, just 3 more months to go......
Galya
Oh I hear ya sister! I was begged to come back to the middle school to teach only students that had Learning Disabilities...well lo and behold I took one look at my caseload and their disabilities and most all are EBD... and tough...well...through out the course of the year I have gotten some into more appropriate settings...which has eliminate big problems of some of the others..my point being... My job was horrible for 4 months..it is getting better... I was blindsided... Hope things become bearable for you...take care!
ReplyDeleteHeather and Beth! Thanks for your wisdom! It is also nice to know that I have some colleagues in this battle.
ReplyDeleteGalya, yes, coming back in the middle of the year is always a challenge. This group is just not done testing me yet. I hope they get tired of it soon though.